Bryan's story, in his own words

I went skiing with some friends February 23, 2010 in Vail. We skied, ate and drank good food and wine. Friday the 26th we were skiing my favorite run that wasn't very groomed, but we were having a ball. Half way through my first run I hit an an edge and fell head first on my left side. The weird thing was that I don't feel like I had any reaction time. I fell and hit hard and my arms never tried to catch myself. It took me a few minutes to gather my thoughts, so I finally got up and skied back down the hill with everyone, went back up and everyone noticed I was asking them the same question over and over. We all agreed it would be good that I head back for the house and relax. I felt okay, no nausea, but my head hurt a little. I called Gayla and casually told her that I crashed and probably got a little bit of a concussion. She got a little ticked that I didn't have a helmet on and told me to go to the doctor, don't sleep, etc.. I felt fine that night.

The next day was Saturday and we had a flight out at noon. I felt sick when I got up and started throwing up.  When we got to the airport we started wondering if it was safe for me to fly home. My friends spoke with some doctor friends and the consensus was that I shouldn't fly in case I had a brain bleed. I decided to not board the plane (it was only minutes before take off) and catch a cab back to the hospital in Vail to get my head checked out in case it was a concussion. Greg started to leave with me but I told him to get on the plane and I'd be on a later flight that night or the next day. It took some convincing to get him to get on. If I would have known what was coming I would have asked him to stay with me.  I grabbed a cab and headed for the hospital ($145.00 ride that took me exactly back to where I had started that morning).  I walked into the hospital amongst 20 other people that have scans everyday there.  After the scan the doctor came in and said, "I hate to be the bearer of bad news."  I quickly thought 'well at least I'm not a baby; I have a concussion and made the right choice to stay.'  He went on to tell me that I had a..., after several ways of beating around the bush, he finally said it: "You have a brain tumor."  It felt as though the entire Emergency room stood still.  I think it actually did. I think everyone knew and I was the last person in the ER to find out.  He emptied the room for me and gave me time to contact family.  My first call was to Gayla. I made sure she wasn't driving and told her the news. Her quote was, "It's going to be fine, we're going to take care of this."  My mom contacted Gayla and put her on a flight to Vail within the hour so she could fly home with me the next day.

The Ride!
I've always prayed about things and I've always known I've been prayed for, but I've never experienced it at this level.

There were a few very substantial phases that confirmed for me that God was in control of this and it was my job to allow Him to show His work through me (what a blessed place to be). In the beginning of this, Christ surrounded me with Godly people and Godly actions. For example:
-72 hours after discovering the tumor in Vail, I was reviewing my MRI in front of one of the best neurosurgeons in Texas who had a 4-6 week waiting list;
-We went to take care of my will and we were referred by a fellow Believer to a Christian attorney in Dallas who prayed with us as we went over the documents;
-The day Gayla pulled up at boot camp at 5:15 AM and KTLY praised the doctors and nurses at Presbyterian Hospital Dallas, which was exactly where I was;
-When we met with my anesthesiologist and he prayed with me and Gayla before surgery. It was then that I truly felt God pick me up.
I really felt Gods presence and I knew all I needed to do was 'hold on to the rail' and ride it out. I figured this was God telling me, 'I've got to pick certain people along the way, and you happen to be the lucky guy that I'm going to use.'  From that point on I just felt like I was actually in His hands. It was the most comforting feeling. It was the first time ever in my life that I had absolutely nothing to worry about. You hear stories like that and I've wondered how people can just let go and let God. But when you're in the middle of it, everything else just goes away.  Even moving forward, with the pending results of the pathology report, I feel certain that I will maintain this strength and faith in following His plan. I always said 'it's part of Gods plan,' but it's a different place when you know... when you just KNOW... that whatever happens, I'm going to do exactly what God is showing me to do, and that's to hold on tight and do everything humanly possible to share with everyone what it's like to be in this place.

My friend Ken made a good point recently. He said, 'there's a balance on picking the right time to approach people and share [the Word of God] and not pushing people away.' I really think that's why  God picked someone like me, just an average guy who believes in Jesus, to show how the power of prayer and the miracles that God can perform on normal people. I am a walking testimony of God's grace (=an undeserved gift). This could have been perceived as a very bad and tragic situation. It was a blessing to go through something that should have been so difficult and so frightening, but yet I never had any of those feelings once He took over. In the end I learned a big lesson in life. I want people to know how much it means to have so many caring people surrounding me with thoughtfulness and kindness. I want all of you to know that each one of you in your own way, whether it was peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for my family at the hospital, a simple phone call saying 'my kids love you', remarkable homemade meals (thanks for setting this up Toni), a small hand written note on my alarm clock (that still sits there), sushi dinner deliveries, a brief late night hospital visit, or even a text. It's just important that people realize that all of those things mean so much in those times. So really, after it's all said and done, in life's most difficult times, God really does make things better and fixes things.  As difficult as it seems, if you'll just put your faith and trust in Christ, it will be for the better. I know it was for me.

The strength that God gave Gayla and the faith she had going into this was untested, it was never questioned. The inner strength that she had on the front end and throughout of this wasn't going to be budged. Never once did she question God and how He was going to take care of this. The first thing she told me on Saturday, February 26th at 2:52 PM, as I sat in the ER by myself and told her I had a brain tumor, she told me, "it's going to be fine." I believe on that day she felt like I feel today, that we're going to do whatever needs to be done, but only with God's help. That really showed through and helped us anchor to that the whole time.  I think that's what faith does for you.

Darcy gave me more powerful scripture and meaningful 'Dad, don't you worry' stuff than anyone else over these past two weeks. It was amazing to see that she really has that level of faith and that she is a sweet and confident Christian young woman.

My mom, sisters Tera and D'Anna,  and brother-in-law Doug were with me Sunday through Thursday. Every time we get together since I left Wyoming in 1985, our goodbyes were always filled with tears and sadness. The Wednesday night they left the hospital before going back to Wyoming, it was much different. I think my family was comforted by the overwhelming peace the surrounded me and Gayla. Because of that, they were able to relax and spend quality with me and my family with no other worries. They were able to leave and head back home with a happy heart knowing that I'm in good hands, even when they're so far away.

God used my confident little Codi Grace as my strength. She stood next to me often and looked at me as if to say, 'Dad, this is no problem.' It was amazing to me, sometimes I felt like I was feeling the person who said the least, the most.  I hope one day she realizes how much her quiet confidence meant to me.

Shawn and Doug were an amazing part of this and I don't think they even realized it. They were the 'father figure' for my girls when I couldn't be. They held the girls and played with them as if they were me. Between Shawn and Doug, my girls were well taken care of, because they need their Dad. Girls, have no fear; I'm  back.

One thing that I'll never forget was Gayla's mom when she said: 'God shines through us when we allow him to.'  This is my new proverb.

Sincerely,
Bryan
3/22/10
9:40 AM